"Honey I blew up our catcher ..."

Mauer keeps growing, and growing .... 

"Joe Mauer is getting a little old for a growth spurt.

But the Twins catcher, who was 6-4 last season, has pushed past 6-5 and is approaching 6-6.

The team lists him at 6-5 in the media guide, but Mauer acknowledged that he is actually 6-6 "wearing shoes."I've been growing ever since last year," he said Wednesday. "I don't want to get too big, or I might have to move [positions]."

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$5 says its a spiked Gatorade growth hormone plot by Ozzie Guillen, so that the Twins have to move Mauer from behind the plate, where he has the most offensive value.